One email. Hours of overthinking. Why do we do this to ourselves?
But I shouldn’t be surprised. I was one of these people too. I’ve seen this struggle play out over and over – the hesitation, the anxiety, the endless mental loops.
A simple message from a boss or colleague can trigger a spiral – overanalyzing every word, questioning your worth, replaying worst-case scenarios.
And yet, the “obvious” solution – just replying, asking for clarification, or pushing back – feels impossible.
It’s frustrating to watch, but I get it. It always seems to trace back to the same root cause: early conditioning.
Somewhere along the way, you learned that speaking up was risky. That questioning authority led to consequences. That your voice didn’t matter.
Now, as adults, we carry that belief into every interaction – without even realizing it.
But as someone who’s stepped out of this vicious cycle, I can tell you – the fear is always worse than reality.
The first thing we have to ask ourselves is: What belief is stopping me from doing something about this?
If replying feels impossible, could you forward the email to a trusted colleague and say, “Does this make sense to you?”
Could you draft a reply – even if you never send it – just to prove to yourself that you can?
And what happens if you do hit send?
Most of the time, nothing. No disaster. No fallout. Just a response, maybe a quick answer, maybe even a “Thanks.”
And if something does come back? Now you have clarity. Now you know.
The strongest belief that can override all of this?
The belief that it’s important to step outside of our comfort zone – because this is the only way we grow.
"I believe that in order to grow - I have to step outside of my comfort zone"
Find out what this means for you – and take that one small step at a time.